The Great Escape – Part One Again

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Harry Houdini was considered the greatest escape artist who ever had lived.

I was born in 1947 in Kingsburg, California.

That was the year and place of my own greatest escape.

Perhaps what is so remarkable about it

Is that it was so ordinary.

I don’t remember it at all, I can only imagine it.

I was just floating around in the dark, minding my own business. Suspended in this stuff that I have since learned is called ambiotic fluid which makes it sound like transmission fluid, which I suppose it was. I thought it was love, but what did I know. I didn’t even remember anything! Memory is like a filing system and you’ve got to have labels for a filing system. I hadn’t aquired any yet. I later learned those are called words. I was just drifting there and listening to the two hearts beating away. My own and my mom’s. We were one then.

Anyways, I was just peacfully floating around in the dark, well, actually, it was starting to get a little stuffy in there and I was starting to get bored, when whoooosh!,

All hell broke loose. It was the most violent thing I had ever experienced!

It was absolutely cataclysmic! I went flying down this tube that kept getting narrower and narrower and then I got all jambed up. I liked to thought that I was getting the life squeezed out of me! It was like being swallowed by a big boa constrictor and being helplessly forced down into it’s stomach by these waves of being squashed, except I wasn’t being eaten, I was getting out! I could see a light down there at the end! At last, there was this great big gooey, bloody gush and I was out. I hit the floor running, straight for the light! I only paused long enough for them to cut the cord that still bound me, and I haven’t stopped running towards that light since.

But, of course, you recognise this story because it happened to you too, right? For some of you, I’ll bet it was even more terrifying. That’s how most of us got here. I witnessed the births of my own chilren and a few others too and that’s what happened. My wife was a hippy mid-wife.

It was awful, just awful and kind of fantastic and wonderful too! Well, you can forget the spaceship theory now.

……To be continued.

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